- Christian Shoddy is Still ShoddyPosted 50 days ago
- We Are Not Hoodlums.Posted 52 days ago
- Of Hobbits and AngelsPosted 61 days ago
- Rags to Riches and Back to Rags AgainPosted 72 days ago
- Are We There Yet?Posted 80 days ago
- The Zero NetworkPosted 82 days ago
- The Gospel and Chick-Fil-APosted 101 days ago
- Darla, Cade and the Boy at the AquariumPosted 110 days ago
Seeing Dating For What It Is
Dating is something that I have never really thought was an issue that mattered to God because of how minuscule it can seem when compared to deeper issues. Even the word itself has a specific stigma to it. It’s as if this word holds some sort of power that causes conversations to get awkward and people to get either extremely happy or ridiculously sad. Some people even get angry at the very thought of the word.
Most people that write about dating come across as if they are the ultimate authority on the issue. They all have written a dozen books about it and although each author differs in opinion and logic they somehow all remain correct. It’s ridiculous, as if a self help book is going to launch you into a Godly relationship with the opposite sex. I’m not even going to pretend to be like that because the truth is I don’t have it figured out.
I’m just adding to the conversation… taking the things I’ve noticed and mixing them with a few things that I have learned. As a single Christian guy I am trying to find where I belong in all of this. I love the idea of marriage and I realize that dating is a prerequisite to that endeavor. My problem with dating is that it has been completely abused and in some situations it has become extremely unhealthy.
I wish I could say that I haven’t been a part of the impurity of dating but I would be lying if I didn’t admit to the role I played. It starts with the feeling of loneliness and from there we begin to loan our hearts out to anyone who will listen and show us affection.
Dating gets distorted because we act in the flesh and we look for joy and fulfillment in cheap interactions with sinful people. It seems as if we don’t understand how dangerous this really is and I believe that we would be compelled to change if we knew the magnitude of our actions. When it comes to something like dating, it’s vital for us to realize that we aren’t just dealing with ourselves. There is another heart involved and when we abuse dating we are just proving that we aren’t mature enough to be responsible for that person’s heart.
Stop treating dating like it’s some sort of sick sport that you pride yourself in being good at. We’ve all done it and it and it just ends in a feeling of emptiness and guilt. Start looking at the girls you are in community with as daughters of the King of Kings and not some new project that you’re working on. Spend your time praying for the girls you spend time with and make sure that your actions and intentions glorify God and not yourself.
Remember that you were purchased by the blood of Jesus Christ and not by some guy who wants you for your body. Stop dressing in a way that encourages guys to treat you like less than who you are. NEVER pursue a relationship with a guy. That’s his job and he should pride himself in winning over your heart through prayer and authenticity. The guy who truly loves you will pursue you even after he has you.
We were created to have love, be love and give love but it is impossible to do that outside of the love of Jesus Christ. We need to be training ourselves in Godliness and be able to get to the point in our relationship with God where we are ready to be responsible for somebody else’s heart.
I want to see a generation of followers of Jesus Christ rise up and become men and woman of character and integrity, and I want to see it extend to dating. I want to see dating become something important that we pray and fast over, something that we take completely serious.
About Shane StoltzfusWriter, follower of Jesus and avid story teller.
Christian Shoddy is Still Shoddy
A tense cloud hovered above the desk that separated us....
- Posted 50 days ago
We Are Not Hoodlums.
I think we've all been there. You've scoured the Christian...
- Posted 52 days ago
Of Hobbits and Angels
After seeing the new Hobbit movie (in 3D nonetheless), and...
- Posted 61 days ago
Rags to Riches and Back to Rags Again
I love a good rags-to-riches story. Sam “Walmart” Walton sold...
- Posted 72 days ago
Are We There Yet?
A few months ago, my family and I moved from...
- Posted 80 days ago
Verse of the Week
––1 Thessalonians 5:21 (ESV)