Coffee Shop Talk: Serving Others, Missionary Dating, and Being Equally Yoked

• Tweet
• Pin It

[box_light]Ed. note: This is B. She’s our weekly Q&A writer and will be answering questions from a female perspective (naturally). You can find her subsection under “Faith.” Do you have a question or comment? Send it to us on Facebook, Twitter, via email, or in the comments, and we’ll do our best to have her answer it in future weeks.[/box_light]

[box_light]Double ed. note: Thanks for your patience and enjoy the Friday version of Coffee Shop Talk![/box_light]

[divider]

What does it mean to you to serve others?

Serving others can look so many different ways. It could be helping out with projects or helping clean up… maybe organizing events (etc. etc.). For me, personally, defining what serving others is is simple.

Love them.

If I am focused on loving others the way Christ loves them, I will want to give my time, my talents, my money, my abilities to serve them. It’s going to look different for every person, but one thing that should look the same is love. God is love and He’s the whole reason why we serve.

[divider]

What are you thoughts on “missionary” dating?

First, for those of you who were just as confused by this question as I was when I first read it–––let me clarify. This question is asking what my thoughts are on dating someone who doesn’t believe in Jesus with the intention of trying to bring them to salvation. Now, please don’t take this as the “be all, end all” of answers. I’m not God and He can do whatever He likes and can use whatever and whoever He wants to bring people to Him. Could that be through a relationship? Definitely. With that being said, be very, very careful.

In every relationship, I would encourage you to enter into serious prayer first, seeking the heart and will of God before doing anything. My thoughts, however, are this:

Do not date people who do not love the Lord.

If you are a God-fearing man [or woman] and you are seeking the face of God and desiring the things of Him–––wouldn’t you want to be with someone who is seeking the same things? If you want to grow and dream God-sized dreams and see His Kingdom come in this generation alongside a woman [or man] in a relationship, don’t you want them to love God too? God is everything to me and the most important person in my life. I don’t understand how I could date someone who doesn’t love Him too. [I don't want to get ahead of myself though. We'll talk about that in the next question.]

The saying goes, “look at their friends and you’ll see who they are.” It’s true. We adapt and change dependent on who we surround ourselves with. ”Bad company corrupts good character.” I don’t think I need to list examples or details. I’m sure you can all think of situations and instances where you’ve seen this. These two phrases carry over into the dating world too.

God can definitely use you to bring someone to Him in a relationship… so be their friend. You don’t need to date someone to save them. Only God can save them anyway. And more times than not, Satan uses those types of relationships to keep the one who loves Jesus stagnant in their faith or completely fall away from God. So please, be very very careful.

Once again, I don’t have all the answers, but I know God does. He says,

“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?”
–2 Corinthians 6:14, ESV

[divider]

Where is the line drawn on being equally yoked?

Obviously, this question is closely related to the one above, but I think this question is dealing moreso with two Christians dating. This again, comes down to time in prayer and seeking the will of God.

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.”
–Proverbs 27:17, NLT

As believers, when we are all seeking and actively pursuing God, we will be challenged and sharpened by the fellow believers around us doing the same. The same is true in a relationship… the key though, is the pursuit.

Are both people actively and willingly seeking more and more of God individually before they seek together? 

That is my key question to all of you. If the person you are dating doesn’t want to seek God on their own, chances are they’ll be gritting their teeth when you want to seek Him together. Both people need to be strong in who they are in Christ before they can be in a relationship. God didn’t create relationships so that we could “complete” each other. Only God can complete us. God created relationships to sharpen us and strengthen us for HIS glory and to lift HIS name high.

If your relationship isn’t doing the one thing it was designed for, chances are you are unequally yoked.

In everything guys, pray. Pray continually for wisdom and guidance when it comes to relationships. Hearts are on the line. Don’t break someone else’s and guard yours from being broken.

[divider]

…

until our next chat,

B.

[box_success]Send us your questions! You can do so via Facebook, Twitter, via email, or in the comments, and we’ll do our best to have her answer it in future weeks.[/box_success]

Related Posts

• 

  Christian Shoddy is Still Shoddy
  Christian Shoddy is Still Shoddy
• 

  We Are Not Hoodlums.
  We Are Not Hoodlums.
• 

  Of Hobbits and Angels
  Of Hobbits and Angels
• 

  Rags to Riches and Back to Rags Again
  Rags to Riches and Back to Rags Again